In the previous video, I talked about how human beings are naturally meant to progress to create to build to move forward. Which is contrary to our diet culture which is restricting and withholding and generally leaving us feeling bad about ourselves. We want to feel good about ourselves in order to succeed so that we can continue to enjoy this process and feel like we’re making a difference. It’s like nurturing a child. Or working for a charity. How you feel when you’re doing something good for somebody else.
We have to think about that in terms of how we treat ourselves? So that we can grow and be healthy and succeed in our goals. Metaphors are very helpful when thinking about our health. And I have been thinking more and more about comparing how we treat ourselves to doing charity work. When we do something good for someone else we usually don’t go into the process feeling bad or ashamed. You go into a charity thinking, what can I do? How can I help you? Put me to work.
We know it will be hard work but we know it’s for a good cause so we have this pure, open willingness to move forward. So what if we did that for ourselves? Where we just think of our health journey like a pure, natural, positive way to help ourselves and move forward.
Because how do we feel and think when we think about our health. It’s mostly negative. How do you feel when you get on a scale? Then after we see the number on the scale we think I shouldn’t have eaten this or I should have gone to the gym. Blaming ourselves. Then thinking into the future, we think about all the things we can’t have. Well now I can’t eat that cookie. Now I can only eat bland vegetables. This is what we can hopefully change. So that we are looking at our health journey like we would approach helping someone in need. Treating ourselves in a caring way.
So how do we do that? How do we go from I feel bad about this process to I feel good about this process? I’m gonna be honest with you. This is not something that is easy. This is a process I work everyday. It is challenging and I also because have such an emotional connection to food.
So I have to go through the things I’m going to be talking about every day and solidify more and more, and remind myself why I’m doing this. What my path is. What are the benefits? If I focus on the negative points that I previously mentioned then I don’t feel good and I get a lot of anxiety. So what do I do instead?
So to pivot here a bit because before we go any further I don’t want you to think that we just go from feeling negative about this experience to feeling good in an instant. I don’t want you to feel like we are avoiding the reasons why we might feel guilt or shame around health. Or that we are avoiding dealing with the reasons why we have an emotional attachment to eating. That I’m telling you don’t feel bad, feel good.
We will address that in another video but that also might be something you will need to work through with a therapist. To really find out and get to the bottom of all the negativity that’s associated with dieting and food and weight loss and all of that. I want to make sure before we go further that you don’t think that I’m telling you don’t be sad, be happy. Like it’s that easy because I know it’s not. Like I said, this is a process I work every day.
To be honest and maybe I will get very real here for a moment. I’m feeling some anxiety about eating right now in this moment. So I will go through the process with myself in real time. So first, I remind myself. That food is there for me. I have a plan to eat wonderful, healthy food all day today. I have a great plan for myself that I just need to stick with. I am not hungry. I had a satisfying breakfast. And soon I will have a good, satisfying lunch. There’s plenty of food.
I like metaphors in this process and so I’m a dancer and part of dance technique is about how the ground is there for you. The floor is there for you so you can just stand. You can use the floor to help you move through space. It’s a foundation that’s always there for you. So it’s the same thing I remind myself with food. I eat a very healthy diet. I eat great food that’s there for me and supports my body. It’s supporting my health and my goals in life. It’s nurturing me, it’s doing wonderful things for me.
So that’s where I go first. Reminding myself that my food is there. I’m not starving myself. I don’t fast, I mean that’s another topic but fasting is not for me. So just magnifying, I’m magnifying
the positive points as to why I’m doing what I’m doing. Filling my body with foods that are supporting me and my health goals. Now just saying all of this out loud I already feel my anxiety going away.
But we can then go to the next step. Which is why am I doing this? Why is it important to me to be on this health journey? And then magnifying all the reasons why you want to be on a health journey. One reason is because I am a dancer and I want to be able to dance as long as I possibly can. I still want to take classes for myself and teach.
I want to be able to keep up with my kids and be there as long as I can for my family. If we go on vacation I want to be able to hike or do whatever activities we have planned. Why are you on this health journey? Why? List as many possible reasons as you can so that it becomes super important to you.
And then I think about my health history and the things that I’m trying to prevent as I get older. There are some health issues that my family members have had to deal with. If I stay on track with my health plan hopefully these are things I can avoid. Just like the previous point I list as many things as I can as far as health issues that I want to avoid to solidify why I’m doing what I’m doing. Make it as clear as possible.
You might notice that weight loss is not really a part of the reasons that I give myself to keep on track on my health journey. Even though, yes, I do want to maintain a certain weight but I don’t like to talk about weight loss. Or how we look, our appearance. Even though I live in reality and I know that’s mostly why people want health advice.
And again, just like I’m not addressing the negativity around, why you might be having issues with weight or sticking with a health plan. Not that we don’t want to talk about it, not that I’m trying to avoid it. But I feel like when we are moving forward that’s one journey. Talking about our weight, talking about why we might have an issue with emotional eating, that’s another journey. I think of those ideas as separate from each other.
And we could debate on whether we need to process the why we might have difficulty staying on a health plan. I know there are people who have said, oh, you have to, you have to figure this out, you have to figure out why you behave this way or that way in order to move forward. But I also remember being in therapy once and I was really trying to figure something out and the therapist said you know, sometimes we don’t need to know the reason why. So there’s different thoughts and opinions on that.
It’s nice to have some sense of why we do the things we do. It’s helpful to understand. But, does that mean that then you’re able to let it go so that you can move on? Not necessarily. I know why I emotionally eat. I know why I have those feelings. Just because you know something through, doesn’t mean the feelings will just go away. The years and years of things that were established when you were a child that are now in your body. But understanding is important.
But what if you can’t figure it out at this time. You can’t always know the answer. So if you can’t necessarily find the answer, does that mean you can’t move forward? What if you’ve blocked something out? Awareness is good. Awareness is helpful. But in my opinion, it’s not absolutely necessary.
So, going back to why weight loss was not one of my main goals? It’s not the strongest reason for moving forward on a health plan. I personally feel that weight loss is not a strong enough goal or motivation to keep people on a health journey. It’s superficial. What we might want to look like is a result most likely from society. What society thinks we should look like.
Currently there’s also a lot of talk about body positivity. And we should absolutely love ourselves no matter what. No matter what size we are. No matter what we weigh. No matter what we look like. We should absolutely love ourselves and feel good about where we are in life.
I really believe that deep down inside of us no matter what our self-esteem is, no matter the messages we get. But I really think each one of us has a little voice inside of us saying, you are good enough just the way you are. Because that’s the truth. That’s the truth, and I really believe that. Whether that’s God to you or an energy source that connects us all in this universe. But I do believe that we are all connected to some sort of truth in this world and that each of us understands the truth. It could be covered up by life experiences and messages. But each of us knows the truth. We know deep down inside that losing weight for one reason or another is mostly for society. It’s not for us. It’s for someone else. Something outside ourselves. And that’s not the truth about our self worth.
Let me say this again. We know the truth. That we are good enough just the way we are. That might be covered up by our life experiences and messages we received growing up. Whether we were properly nurtured as children, if we had supportive friends and family or if we experienced trauma. Deep down we know. We know that we don’t need to lose weight for anyone else. I’m good enough the way I am. Why am I doing this for you? So that’s a good thing. But I know weight is an issue. Yes, I check my weight on the scale. The scale is one of the only things we can do to check our progress and monitor how we’re doing at home. And it can be a symptom of health issues so we do need to check our weight. But I don’t think for most people it’s a good enough motivating factor to help someone stick with a health plan.
Okay, so let me go back. We want to go on a health plan. We want to make it positive so that we stick with it. So we need to change our perspective so this is health journey not just a weight loss journey. We do this by first remembering that healthy, good food is always there for me. It’s got my back. Second, why do I want to be healthy? And third, are there any health issues that run in my family or that I’m already experiencing that I want to take care of. Make all of those points as real and as personal as possible so that this journey really means something to you. It is important.
Moving forward. The next thing we do now is we start celebrating our wins. That’s another way to make this a positive experience. Celebrating your wins. And I mean, any tiny little win you can think of. I want you to celebrate the fact you got out of bed this morning. That you brushed your teeth. That you fed yourself breakfast. That you got yourself to work. Do you have kids or a partner? Did you say good morning to them in a nice, friendly way? Good job! Celebrate!
I’m serious about this. Because there’s enough criticism. There’s enough criticism out there. It’s everywhere, constantly. So we need to give ourselves so much positivity and flood ourselves with encouragement. We all are enough, we all are good enough. We’re all meant to be here. Celebrate all your wins. No matter what.
And then the final step I’m going to talk about today is to have gratitude. Be thankful for everything. All the things you have, the things you’ve accomplished, the things you’ve learned. Your family, your friends. Thankful for just being here and being you. Have gratitude for everything. I even have gratitude when I make a mistake or stray from my health plan. When I have a moment where I feel really stressed and I over indulge and eat in a way that would normally make me feel guilt or shame. I instead try to have gratitude even then.
I’m thankful for the fact that I was able to have the treat. That I am able to afford it, I’m thankful that I can have it in my house. but even thankful for the fact that my body was working hard to take care of me. Because that’s really what emotional eating is. It’s your body trying to take care of you in some way. I have another video on that. Check that out because it’s interesting.
Because there’s enough negativity. I feel like I don’t need to cause more. I need to counteract that because it’s so much easier for us to focus on negative things than it is to focus on positive things. The more you can flood yourself with positivity the better.
Okay. So summing up. How do we make this journey a positive experience so we can succeed? We think about it as a health journey and not a weight loss journey. It’s a journey for your health. It’s a journey for you to feel great. For you to go through life feeling like you have tons of positive energy that you want to share with the world.
Then you’re solidifying the reasons why. Because of how you want to move through this world and avoid or improve any health issues. Finally celebrate your wins, tell yourself you’re enough, and have lots of gratitude.
That was a lot of information! If you want to go deeper into all of these things, which is extremely helpful, look for my upcoming workbook and video series. This will allow you to go through these points and more so that you can create your own health plan and move forward with positivity, celebration and success! Thank you so much. I am thankful for you! Until next time!
